Having reentered the dating pool in the past few years in my late 40s I can tell you the corollary of your message: there are so many amazing women out there who are starved for finding men who have a growth mindset, communicate maturely, lead with kindness and optimism, and are in touch with an emotion other than anger. My friends who are women are among my best and most reliable of friends. I can't speak to Reddit as much but I see the toxicity, and it is pernicious and extends into real life. My friend J was assaulted violently by her son's father on her own front porch over next to nothing. Luckily she doesn't take shit from anyone and gave as good as she got. Every woman i know has stories like this. It's tragic and avoidable. We need a reckoning.