There's wisdom to be had listening to her on this, mon frer. She knows of what she is speaking.

Consent, confidence, command (as in a command of knowledge and skills required), and communication are definitely the 4 C's of wonderful sex, at least in my predominantly in typical masculine-on-femimine cishet experience (well that and loads of kink). Mutual feedback is so critical. I cannot tell you the number of times a young woman has told me about her guy who has connectionless sex almost like she's not even there except as a receptacle for him.

This is making me realize I need to get back to writing more about sex again.